Friday, August 23, 2013

Faux Pas

His apology caught me by surprise.

“I’m so sorry,” the lifeguard said, as if he’d mortally wounded me. “I’m so, so, sorry.” I stared at him, perplexed. What insult had he thrown at me that I'd missed?

“I’m so sorry, but may I ask your age?”

Was that all? Clearly, he was going to express his shock when I revealed my age. He was going to say that to watch me swim, he could have sworn I was half my age. That not even the teenagers he coaches on the community swim team swim as smoothly, as fast. Clearly he was going to say that to look at my trim body and muscular arms, he would have guessed me to be at least 20 years younger.

“Oh,” he said with a hint of shame, when I said, “I’m 55.”

“Oh,” he repeated, shifting in his chair. “I was going to mention that in the mornings, we have a swim session for seniors. It’s less crowded then.”

The frame froze then. My mouth dropped and hung open for a few seconds. My eyes lost focus, probably because tears were filling them. I swallowed. I reminded myself to breathe.

He’s a kid, I told myself. He doesn’t know. What does he know? To his young eyes, 40 looks like 50 looks like 60. Shake it off.

“Not yet,” I heard myself say, forcing a chuckle. “I’m not there yet.”

Our smiles were awkward. There wasn’t anything more to say. I turned and walked into the locker room, then into the first shower stall, and closed the curtain tight.


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